Follow your heart....

If anyone would have told me a week ago that this past weeks events would have taken place the way they did, I don't think I would have believed them. I mentioned in my last post that I couldn't believe all that had happened in the past month, and now that same sentiment is echoed for me for the past 7 days. Conversations with staff, hearing about things happening in the community, and the death of the family member of one of our staff, plus some other smaller things that just make the situation even more complex, and you get a snapshot of just how much can take place...and change...in just a few days.

Life in general seems to have been thrown for a loop. Take a look at the news for the Twin Cities area, and you learn that there were three head on collisions in three different parts of the Twin Cities, on three different successive days. Each one involved a car or vehicle crossing a median, striking another vehicle head on, and each one resulted in a fatality. Stuff like that isn't supposed to happen, right? And of course, it's always to someone else...until it's not.

How do you respond to such events? I don't know why, but this situation has made my head spin...I just seem to be having a hard time putting everything into perspective. Everything is happening around me, to people around me, and I am involved by association, but not involved at all. It's very strange, and I feel so helpless...and called to act at the same time. But, I don't know how.

I heard a quote the other Sunday in church that went something like "you don't know that Jesus is all you need until Jesus is all you have." It seems almost cliche at times like this...but I think part of the reason it seems cliche is because we have reached the point where we know it is true, and are scared to accept what it means. To accept this statement means that we have suffered loss - but for this statement to be true, that is utterly and totally necessary - we must suffer the loss of others, the loss of time, and the loss of self to be able to come into what this statement is truly saying to us.

Those moments in life where we are taken down to the skeleton of what we are show us more than ever what we have truly become. We either fall apart entirely, or we learn that the support that holds us up is made of more than what we have created for ourselves. It has been created through our own destruction, and is rebuilt on what remains after each successive demolition of who we are.

This again is a very scattered post...and more an effort of trying to get questions down that have been rolling around in my mind than an effort to find an answer to everything. Hopefully, some of them will come with time, until then, they remain as questions.